For almost 1000 years, Scotland and England have been neighbor nations. For more than half that time, they were foreign countries to each other, often at war. In the 1700s, they joined in a United Kingdom and the new concept of 'Britishness' arose. But this covered over, rather than combined, the long-established identities. For most purposes Scots remained Scots and English remained English, and the old sense of rivalry did not go away. It still remains. In olden times, a war of words and propaganda accompanied the fighting. As the countries got to know each other better, and the fighting died down, the verbal exchanges continued, and became sharper and funnier. This work provides a record of the long contest of verbal warfare across the Border over the centuries. More than a collection of jokes, insults and critical observations, however, it shows how humor in its own way can join as well as divide, providing a handbook that can be enjoyed whichever side you are on.