Pine Cove Books In Publication Order
- Practical Demonkeeping (1992)
- The Lust Lizard of Melancholy Cove (1999)
- The Stupidest Angel (2004)
Bloodsucking Fiends/Love Story Books In Publication Order
- Bloodsucking Fiends (1995)
- You Suck: A Love Story (2007)
- Bite Me: A Love Story (2010)
Grim Reaper Books In Publication Order
- A Dirty Job (2007)
- Secondhand Souls (2015)
Fool Books In Publication Order
- Fool (2009)
- The Serpent of Venice (2014)
- Shakespeare for Squirrels (2020)
Graphic Novels In Publication Order
- The Griff (2011)
Standalone Novels In Publication Order
- Coyote Blue (1994)
- Island of the Sequined Love Nun (1997)
- Lamb (2002)
- Fluke (2003)
- Sacre Bleu (2012)
- Noir (2017)
Pine Cove Book Covers
Bloodsucking Fiends/Love Story Book Covers
Grim Reaper Book Covers
Fool Book Covers
Graphic Novels Book Covers
Standalone Novels Book Covers
Christopher Moore Books Overview
Christopher Moore’s demonically seductive storylines and zany, addictive brand of humor have earned him comparisons to Carl Hiaasen, Christopher Buckley, Douglas Adams, and other comic virtuosos. He’s given us lovelorn vampires, marooned love goddesses, and addled sea beasts. Now discover his ingenious debut novel, in which we meet one of the most memorably mismatched pairs in the annals of literature. the good looking one is one hundred year old ex seminarian and ‘road’ scholar Travis O’Hearn. The green one is Catch, a demon with a nasty habit of eating most of the people he meets. Behind the fake Tudor facade of Pine cove, California, Catch sees a four star buffet. Travis, on the other hand, thinks he sees a way of ridding himself of his toothy traveling companion. The winos, Neo pagans, and deadbeat Lotharios of Pine Cove, meanwhile, have other ideas. And none of them is quite prepared when all hell breaks loose…
Christopehr Moore has pioneered a parade of loopy, hilarious genres that have delighted readers world wide. The comically demonic horror novel. The yuppie meets shaman New Age Western. The California vampire love story. The South Seas adventure novel on acid. Now the maestro of the bizarre brings you his most incredible creation yet a love story starring a sea monster named Steve. It’s ‘Godzilla’ meets ‘The Bridges of Madison County’, as only Christopher Moore could spin it. It’s September in Pine Cove, California, where the tourists have finally decamped for the season, the sun is slanting through the trees, and the local psychiatrist has just decided to switch everyone from antidepressants to placebos without telling them. Suddenly, business is booming at the Head of the Slug Saloon, where a melancholy blues man from the Mississippi Delta has settled in for the winter. Unfortunately for the town’s newly minted blues fans, however, a colossal sea beast is also drawn to the sound of the slide guitar. When a tanker truck explodes at the local gas station, it’s the first sign that all hell is about to break loose in Pine Cove. Can the unlikely constable Theophilus Crowe curb his gonzo appetites long enough to find out who or what is behind the explosion and the resulting series of mysterious crimes? Can Molly Michon, the has been scream queen and resident crazy lady, control her dual personalities? Can anyone explain why a town so morose is suddenly so…
libidinous? And what’s the story behind the mysterious trailer that has just shown up in the back corner of the local trailer park?Wildly original and ferociously funny, The Lust Lizard of Melancholy Cove has enough crazy twists to give anyone a personality disorder and keep them in the throes of convulsive laughter at the same time. Christopehr Moore has pioneered a parade of loopy, hilarious genres that have delighted readers world wide. The comically demonic horror novel. The yuppie meets shaman New Age Western. The California vampire love story. The South Seas adventure novel on acid. Now the maestro of the bizarre brings you his most incredible creation yet a love story starring a sea monster named Steve. It’s ‘Godzilla’ meets ‘The Bridges of Madison County’, as only Christopher Moore could spin it.
Christmas crept into Pine Cove like a creeping Christmas thing: dragging garland, ribbon, and sleigh bells, oozing eggnog, reeking of pine, and threatening festive doom like a cold sore under the mistletoe. ‘Twas the night okay, more like the week before Christmas, and all through the tiny community of Pine Cove, California, people are busy buying, wrapping, packing, and generally getting into the holiday spirit. It is the hap hap happiest time of the year, after all. But not everybody is feeling the joy. Little Joshua Barker is in desperate need of a holiday miracle. No, he’s not on his deathbed; no, his dog hasn’t run away from home. But Josh is sure that he saw Santa take a shovel to the head, and now the seven year old has only one prayer: Please, Santa, come back from the dead. But hold on! There’s an angel waiting in the wings. Wings, get it? It’s none other than the Archangel Raziel come to Earth seeking a small child with a wish that needs granting. Unfortunately, our angel’s not sporting the brightest halo in the bunch, and before you can say ‘Kris Kringle,’ he’s botched his sacred mission and sent the residents of Pine Cove headlong into Christmas chaos, culminating in the most hilarious and horrifying holiday party the town has ever seen. Only Christopher Moore, the man who brought you the outrageous lost gospel Lamb and the hysterical fish tale Fluke could have devised a new holiday classic that tugs at the heartstrings and serves up a healthy slice of fruitcake to boot. Move over, Charles Dickens it’s Christopher Moore time.
Jody never asked to become a vampire. But when she wakes up under an alley dumpster with a badly burned arm, an aching neck, superhuman strength, and a distinctly Nosferatuan thirst, she realizes the decision has been made for her. Making the transition from the nine to five grind to an eternity of nocturnal prowlings is going to take some doing, however, and that’s where C. Thomas Flood fits in. A would be Kerouac from Incontinence, lndiana, Tommy to his fiends is biding his time night clerking and frozen turkey bowling in a San Francisco Safeway. But all that changes when a beautiful, undead redhead walks through the door…
and proceeds to rock Tommy’s life and afterlife in ways he never imagined possible.
‘You bit*ch, you killed me. You suck!’
Being dead sucks. Make that being undead sucks.
Literally. Just ask Thomas C. Flood. Waking up after a fantastic night unlike anything he’s ever experienced, he discovers that his girlfriend, Jody the woman of his dreams is a vampire. And surprise! Now he’s one, too.
For some couples, the whole biting and blood thing would have been a deal breaker. But Tommy and Jody are in love, and they vow to work through their issues. Like how much Jody should teach Tommy about his new superpowers and how much he needs to learn on his own. Plus there’s Tommy’s cute new minion, sixteen year old goth girl Abby Normal. Well, someone has to run errands during daylight hours!
Making the relationship work, however, is the least of Jody and Tommy’s problems. Word has it that the vampire who nibbled on Jody wasn’t supposed to be recruiting any new members into the club. Even worse, Tommy’s erstwhile turkey bowling pals are out to get him, at the urging of a blue dyed Las Vegas call girl named duh Blue.
And that really sucks.
The city of San Francisco is being stalked by a huge shaved vampyre cat named Chet, and only I, Abby Normal, emergency backup mistress of the Greater Bay Area night, and my manga haired love monkey, Foo Dog, stand between the ravenous monster and a bloody massacre of the general public. Whoa. And this is a love story? Yup. ‘Cept there’s no whining. See, while some lovers were born to run, Jody and Tommy were born to bite. Well, reborn, that is, now that they’re vampires. Good thing theirs is an undying love, since their Goth Girl Friday, Abby Normal, imprisoned them in a bronze statue. Abby wants to be a bloodsucking fiend, too, but right now she’s really busy with other stuff, like breaking in a pair of red vinyl thigh high Ska*nkenstein platform boots and wrangling her Ph.D. candidate boyfriend, Steve the love monkey. And then there’s that vampire cat Chet, who’s getting bigger and smarter and thirstier by the minute. Abby thought she and Steve could handle the kitty cat on their own, mais non…
Before you can say ‘OMG! WTF?’ Tommy and Jody are sprung from captivity, and join forces with Abby, Steve, the frozen turkey bowling Safeway crew, the Emperor of San Francisco and his trusty dogs Lazarus and Bummer, Abby’s gay Goth friend Jared, and SF’s finest Cavuto and Rivera to hunt big cat and save the city. And that’s when the fun really begins.
Charlie Asher is a pretty normal guy. A little hapless, somewhat neurotic, sort of a hypochondriac. He’s what’s known as a Beta Male: the kind of fellow who makes his way through life by being careful and constant you know, the one who’s always there to pick up the pieces when the girl gets dumped by the bigger/taller/stronger Alpha Male. But Charlie’s been lucky. He owns a building in the heart of San Francisco, and runs a secondhand store with the help of a couple of loyal, if marginally insane, employees. He’s married to a bright and pretty woman who actually loves him for his normalcy. And she, Rachel, is about to have their first child. Yes, Charlie’s doing okay for a Beta. That is, until the day his daughter, Sophie, is born. Just as Charlie exhausted from the birth turns to go home, he sees a strange man in mint green golf wear at Rachel’s hospital bedside, a man who claims that no one should be able to see him. But see him Charlie does, and from here on out, things get really weird…
. People start dropping dead around him, giant ravens perch on his building, and it seems that everywhere he goes, a dark presence whispers to him from under the streets. Strange names start appearing on his nightstand notepad, and before he knows it, those people end up dead, too. Yup, it seems that Charlie Asher has been recruited for a new job, an unpleasant but utterly necessary one: Death. It’s A Dirty Job. But hey, somebody’s gotta do it. Christopher Moore, the man whose Lamb served up Jesus’ ‘missing years’ with the funny parts left in, and whose Fluke found the deep humor in whale researchers’ lives, now shines his comic light on the undiscovered country we all eventually explore death and dying and the results are hilarious, heartwarming, and a hell of a lot of fun.
‘This is a bawdy tale. Herein you will find gratuitous shagging, murder, spanking, maiming, treason, and heretofore unexplored heights of vulgarity and profanity, as well as nontraditional grammar, split infinitives, and the odd wank…
If that’s the sort of thing you think you might enjoy, then you have happened upon the perfect story!’ Verily speaks Christopher Moore, much beloved scrivener and peerless literary jester, who hath writteneth much that is of grand wit and belly busting mirth, including such laurelled bestsellers of the Times of Olde Newe Yorke as Lamb, A Dirty Job, and You Suck no offense. Now he takes on no less than the legendary Bard himself with the utmost humility and respect in a twisted and insanely funny tale of a moronic monarch and his deceitful daughters a rousing story of plots, subplots, counterplots, betrayals, war, revenge, bared bosoms, unbridled lust…
and a ghost there’s always a bloody ghost, as seen through the eyes of a man wearing a codpiece and bells on his head. Fool A man of infinite jest, Pocket has been Lear’s cherished fool for years, from the time the king’s grown daughters selfish, scheming Goneril, sad*istic but erotic fantasy grade hot Regan, and sweet, loyal Cordelia were mere girls. So naturally Pocket is at his brainless, elderly liege’s side when Lear at the insidious urging of Edmund, the bast*ard in every way imaginable son of the Earl of Gloucester demands that his kids swear their undying love and devotion before a collection of assembled guests. Of course Goneril and Regan are only too happy to brownnose Dad. But Cordelia believes that her father’s request is kind of…
stupid, and her blunt honesty ends up costing her her rightful share of the kingdom and earns her a banishment to boot. Well, now the bangers and mash have really hit the fan. The whole damn country’s about to go to hell in a handbasket because of a stubborn old fart’s wounded pride. And the only person who can possibly make things right…
is Pocket, a small and slight clown with a biting sense of humor. He’s already managed to sidestep catastrophe and the vengeful blades of many an offended nobleman on numerous occasions, using his razor sharp mind, rapier wit…
and the equally well honed daggers he keeps conveniently hidden behind his back. Now he’s going to have to do some very fancy maneuvering cast some spells, incite a few assassinations, start a war or two the usual stuff to get Cordelia back into Daddy Lear’s good graces, to derail the fiendish power plays of Cordelia’s twisted sisters, to rescue his gigantic, gigantically dim, and always randy friend and apprentice fool, Drool, from repeated beatings…
and to shag every lusciously shaggable wench who’s amenable to shagging along the way. Pocket may be a fool…
but he’s definitely not an idiot.
Sam Hunter has spent twenty years escaping his past. Now it has caught up to him in the weirdest of all possible ways. As a boy growing up in Montana, he was Samson Hunts Alone until a deadly misunderstanding with the law forced him to flee the Crow reservation at age fifteen. Today he is a successful Santa Barbara insurance salesman with a Mercedes, a condo and a hollow, invented life. The one day, shortly after his thirty fifth birthday, destiny offers Samuel Hunter the dangerous gift of love in the exquisite form of Calliope Kincaid and a curse in the unheralded appearance of an ancient Indian god by the name of Coyote. Coyote, the trickster, has arrived to transform tranquility into chaos, to reawaken the mystical storyteller within Sam…
and to seriously screw up his existence in the process. From Christopher Moore, author of Practical Demonkeeping, comes a quirky, irreverent new novel of love, myth, metphysics, outlaw biking, angst and outrageous redemption.
A pilot for the Mary Jean Cosmetics Corporation a hopeless geek trapped in a cool guy’s body Tucker Case’s troubles begin one very drunk morning at the Seattle airport Holiday Inn Lounge. Surrendering to the strident will of a call girl who wants desperately to join the Mile High Club, he proceeds to crash his shocking pink jet on the runway totaling the plane and seriously damaging the organ that got him into this mess in the first place. Now, with his flying license revoked, his job and manhood demolished, facing a possible prison term or, worse, the murderous wrath of Mary Jean Dobbins and her corporate goons, Tuck has to run for his life toward the only employment opportunity left for him: piloting a Lear jet for a shady medical missionary and a sexy, naturally blond High Priestess on the remotest of Micronesian island hells. But first he has to get there, encountering spies, cannibals, journalists, and would be bit*ch goddesses every step of the way. Traveling with his Filipino transvestite navigator and a fruit bat companion, Roberto, Tuck braves shark infested waters and a typhoon before reaching the dark heart of a tropical paradise all before his first day of work. A delightfully offbeat look at cargo cults, religious zeal, and pyramid schemes, Island of the Sequined Love Nun is Christopher Moore at his hilarious best. CHRISTOPHER MOORE is the author of three previous novels: Practical Demonkeeping, Coyote Blue, and Bloodsucking Fiends. He lives near Big Sur, California.
The birth of Jesus has been well chronicled, as have his glorious teachings, acts, and divine sacrifice after his thirtieth birthday. But no one knows about the early life of the Son of God, the missing years except Biff. Ever since the day when he came upon six year old Joshua of Nazareth resurrecting lizards in the village square, Levi bar Alphaeus, called ‘Biff,’had the distinction of being the Messiah’s best bud. That’s why the angel Raziel has resurrected Biff from the dust of Jerusalem and brought him to America to write a new gospel, one that tells the real, untold story. Meanwhile, Raziel will order pizza, watch the WWF on TV, and aspire to become Spider Man. Verily, the story Biff has to tell is a miraculous one, filled with remarkable journeys, magic, healings, kung fu, corpse reanimations, demons, and hot babes whose considerable charms fall to Biff to sample, since Josh is forbidden the pleasures of the flesh. There are worse things than having a best friend who is chaste and a chick magnet! And, of course, there is danger at every turn, since a young man struggling to understand his godhood, who is incapable of violence or telling anything less than the truth, is certain to piss some people off. Luckily Biff is a whiz at lying and cheating which helps get his divine pal and him out of more than one jam. And while Josh’s great deeds and mission of peace will ultimately change the world, Biff is no slouch himself, blessing humanity with enduring contributions of his own, like sarcasm and caf latte. Even the considerable wiles and devotion of the Savior’s pal may not be enough to divert Joshua from his tragic destiny. But there’s no one who loves Josh more except maybe ‘Maggie,’ Mary of Magdala and Biff isn’t about to let his extraordinary pal suffer and ascend without a fight. Lamb is the crowning achievement of Christopher Moore’s storied career: fresh, wild, audacious, divinely hilarious, yet heartfelt, poignant, and alive, with a surprising reverence. Let there be rejoicing unto the world! Christopher Moore is come to bring truth, light, and big yuks to fans old and new with the Greatest Story Never Told!
After reverently lambasting the most cherished rites and credos of virtually every one of the world’s major religions in his transcendently hilarious novel Lamb, the one and only Christopher Moore returns with a wild look at interspecies communication, adventure on the high seas, and an eons old mystery. Marine behavioral biologist Nate Quinn is in love with the salt air and sun drenched waters off Maui…
and especially with the majestic ocean dwelling behemoths that have been bleeping and hooting their haunting music for more than twenty million years. But just why do the humpback whales sing? That’s the question that has Nate and his crew poking, charting, recording, and photographing any large marine mammal that crosses their path. Until the extraordinary day when a whale lifts its tail into the air to display a cryptic message spelled out in foot high letters: Bite me. No one on Nate’s team has ever seen such a thing; not his longtime partner, photographer Clay Demodocus, not their saucy young research assistant, Amy. Not even spliff puffing white boy Rastaman, Kona the former Preston Applebaum of New Jersey, could boast such a sighting in one of his dope induced hallucinations. And when a roll of film returns from the lab missing the crucial tail shot and their research facility is summarily trashed Nate realizes that something very fishy indeed is going on. This, apparently, is big, involving dangerously interested other parties competitive researchers, the cutthroat tourist industry, perhaps even the military. The weirdness only gets weirder when a call comes in from Nate’s big bucks benefactor saying that a whale has made contact by phone. And it’s asking for a hot pastrami and Swiss on rye. Suddenly the answer to the question that has daunted and driven Nate throughout his adult life is within his reach. But it’s waiting for him in the form of an amazing adventure beneath the waves, 623 feet down, somewhere off the coast of Chile. And it’s not what anyone would think. It must be said: Christopher Moore’s Fluke is a whale of a novel.